The Oracle

My mum used to speak nineteen to the dozen, but since the stroke she’s turned into a vegetable and she don’t say much. Just flipping expressions, like ‘No use crying over spilled milk,’ and ‘It’s the straw that broke the camel’s back.’ When Molly went to see her she came out with ‘Plenty more fish in the sea.’ That was rich, given what’s going on with Molly and Bob. Now every time I go she tells me: ‘Better not miss the boat.’ The doctor says it’s figurative language. All I know is my mum is turning into the blinking oracle.